Okay. I just need to wait until they all go. I'm going to see how much I weight but in so frigging tired. I got back at 2 last night because of this frigging play that I went to see. My friends did make comments about my weight but its only been a couple of days... Must. Keep. Eyes. Open. Okay... I'm just going to close my eyes for a bit... *snore*... Not. Sleeping.

I frogging exercised a hella a lot today. Holy crap. I'm out all day tomorrow from 5 in the morning. I'm going to fast. Tomorrow I'll post some tips to motivate me and you... We can do this... That sounds cheesy... Pahaha. Oh my fricking god. Ugh I swear I have like super extreme mood swings. Oh well. Um, oh yeah. I had 467 calories today and I weigh 46.5 kg after a night. great right? Stay strong. If I can do it then so can anyone...

I need to be 38... Need.

Ah. Epic failure. Does this look like I miserably failed on my first day or what? Thank you mother. Tomorrow I am going to start fresh. I'm going to the gym tonight. I'm gonna purge what I ate up and burn any extra tonight. I feel crap.

Wow. I was thirsty. Or should I sat fricking starved. As you can see the lovely English weather in the background. Oh god. Now my mums having a go about trust. I wish she'd just shush her face. It's only been a day and she's already noticing change. I've been out of hospital for 5 weeks. I'm not that obvious am I? Oh crap. I better move my backside before I become tonight's dinner. Aaaaah!

Pssst. Pop. Glug. Glug. Glug. Aah. I needed this diet coke.

Total Calorie Content: 4
Fat: <1
Sugar: <1
Everything Else: <1

Hopefully I'll keep this up till dinner tonight. My mums having one of those 'ah! You need to eat! Food is going to be extinct!' Moments... Jeez. I have no idea how I'll get out of this.

More Thinspo!

After that frigging mountain of work, I've kind of gotten into that weird mindset that I want to do this. One of my friends made this stupid joke towards herself but it was so true; I want to be skinny so badly but I love food... In the end food always wins. I'm kind of pissed that this totally happens to me a lot of the time. I've browsed the internet for decades and um here are some more tips:

These are from a popular blog post...

1.  Feeling hungry? Do not impulse eat. Count slowly to 100, and hopefully by the time you are finished your mind will be back on track. If not…keep counting!

2. Starving and need to eat? Diet pops are great! They fill you up quickly and each can is no more the 4 calories OR eat pickles. VERY low in calories!

3. The old Pro Ana trick of NOT sleeping is a MYTH. Less sleep stimulates your appetite and eventually lowers your metabolism. Just insure you don’t eat any thing two hours before bed!

4. Drink 8 glasses of water a day! This will not only fill you up but metabolize everything you are eating, and keeping you insides cleansed of fatty build-ups.

5. Negative calories are your best friend. Feeling hungry or need to munch? Eat celery.

6. Fibre is great filler. It tends to expand in the stomach to make you feel fuller.

7. Always exercise away at least the amount of calories you eat. Or better you 2x!

8. DO NOT forget about the three B's. Bake, broil and boil. These keep your food from being saturated with fat and grease.

9. The best fruit for you? Strawberries, cherries and blue berries, watermelon and melon in general. Low in cals and a metabolism booster!

10. Stay absolutely away from ALL fried foods. That is unless your true desire is to look like a cow.

11. Lots and lots of strength training is important in due with cardio. Strength training burns calories for up to 24 hours after the work out!

12. Be strong! If you feel you must eat tell yourself ‘I can wait an hour’. By the end of the hour you will have burnt more calories and had time to think about NOT eating and how beneficial that is.

13. At some place with delicious foods? Take a break. Savour three bites of everything on your plate and stop!  Craving gone, sample finished.

14. Drink COLD water. This will actually burn more calories as your body fights to keep homeostasis (keep your inside temperature regular).

15. Just craving a munch? Chew on ice cubes, more water, and the chewing craving gone!

16. Gum isn’t a bum! Whenever you are fasting chew gum! It helps with cravings, burns calories, and keeps your mouth full, and NOT with food.

17. Wearing tight jeans works wonders! You can literally see the fat bulging! You won’t want to eat in those jeans.

18. Keep a list of BAD foods. Tape this to a door or a refrigerator. DO NOT allow yourself to eat these foods under any normal circumstances. Remember persistence is the key!

19. You can diverge a binge by simply chewing what you are craving then spitting it out. This will help take an edge of the cravings and keep you from binging.

20. Keeping a journal is SO important. Fill it with thinspo, goals, frustrations and anything weight related you can think of. This keeps you motivated.

21. Find a buddy. Real life or online. Go to Buddy Finder  (coming soon!) on this site and find someone you look. Email them, OR advertise yourself on this site. Buddies are very very helpful in weight loss!

22. One time when you SHOULD be full is when grocery shopping. Make sure you feel positively stuffed (even if it is on diet coke) This way you will buy less fattening foods. DO NOT allow yourself to buy binge like foods, that way, you won’t HAVE binge foods.

23. Weigh yourself while holding a dumbbell or two. Then, weigh yourself without. Imagine this being the weight you lost! This is a great motivator!